RARA-AVIS: this noir flic I seen

From: Frederick Zackel ( fzackel@wcnet.org)
Date: 29 Jan 2006

A small film crew went down to the Tough Town, the toughest part of the City; they were slumming, hoping to get some gripping footage to shock and awe the straights who lived Uptown. Blondie Fatale, lead in this low-budget indie flick, got snatched by some ignorant goons who needed a patsy to get the heat off them, and she got tossed into the dark shadows. Harry Dick, the toughest monkey in Tough Town, saw her and fell for her goldy locks. Now, Harry Dick lacked all self-control; he'd kill you just as soon as look at you; he took what he wanted when he wanted it; he had zero morals, too; he was that kind of guy. Anyway, he didn't rescue her. No, he snatched her up, didn't cut her loose, man-handled her and kept her in shackles, and took her to his pad to do with what he wanted. She cuts herself free during the night and escapes, and then he goes after her. Only when he has to rescue her from some big-teeth baddies does he realize, hey, I like this Blondie Fatale. Her
 buddies from film school save her butt, and bring down Harry Dick, and then they decide to show him off to the straights who live Uptown. But Harry Dick busts free, snatches the Blondie Fatale again, and wastes a bunch of straights on his way out of Uptown. Cornered by John Law, Harry Dick gets blown away, and Blonde Fatale gets free.

King Kong is noir.

Fred Zackel

The moral of the story: The biggest testicles have the smallest brains.

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This archive was generated by hypermail 2b29 : 29 Jan 2006 EST