RE: RARA-AVIS: Practical tips from hardboiled dicks

From: Anthony Dauer (
Date: 06 Nov 2000

Extracting Information Part Deux

... this one's from a short lived television show staring Michael Madsen called "Vengeance Unlimited" ... requires two goons, a box of beef, and a chain saw.

Put each goon in their own room ... preferably rooms that connect by a door
... ensure that each goon can't see each other or what you'll much inside the adjoining room. Put the box of beef in the room with the goon who isn't likely to have the information without letting the other goon see it. Have the chain saw in the room with the goon who you want to talk. Pick up the chain saw and make a few trial pulls at it while walking over to the door and tell the goon that they're next. Inside the room with the other goon fire up the chain saw and remove the duct tape from over the goon's mouth to allow them to scream. Using the chain saw cut up the box of beef (don't forget to wear black rubber gloves, apron and boots as well as a pair of goggles. Cut up the meat until you're cover in pieces of meat and splashes of blood. Recover the goon's mouth and go at the beef with the chain saw for a moment or two more. Let the chain saw die down and return the room with the other goon dripping with gore ... at this point you can say something campy like ... "Beef, it's what's fer dinner!" Goon in this room doesn't have their mouth taped by the way ... start cranking up the chain saw if they aren't already begging to talk.

Anthony Dauer

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